Ok, so the High Priestess turned Momma Bear...sue me.

For the most part, I try really hard to give my kids their autonomy. I encourage them, I let them know that I support them, I celebrate their talents, and I'm their biggest fan...but I try really hard to do all that from the sidelines.

Throughout this "Ellen" process, I've just been the moral support, the transportation, the rah rah section. But I've also been there for every phone call from the producers and all the emotional ups and downs. I've been there as her job has been held over her head by stupid employers. I've been there when they've taken her on an E-ticket ride for this ridiculous talent showcase that they've forced upon her. First it's on, then it's off, then it's on again. Then they decide she can't play the uke and sing (which she never wanted to do anyway), then she and Mary write a poem (which is SO friggin funny and would seriously blow them away..but the producers are stupid), then they tell her to bring her rhythm sticks (which she hasn't touched since she was 12 or 13), then they panic when she drops them in rehearsal and ask her to go back to the uke (but she can't sing because she's been sick and her voice sucks right now), which in turn, makes her cry.

THAT was the last straw for me. I don't like seeing her cry. I especially don't like it because they've backed her into a corner and it's not fair. I also hate it because they've completely showcased ONE contestant's talent (Pietrina the Karaoke Queen) at the expense of all the other girls. It's biased and lopsided. And if she got eliminated because of it, it would be completely unfair. Suddenly, without warning, while she teared up in the dressing room and Producer Melissa asked her "are you ok?", a pissed-off voice from somewhere said.."NO! She's NOT ok!" Uh oh, I think that came out of me. SHIT. It did. I said it. And that was quickly followed by; "this is not her talent and it's being pushed as if it is..you guys should let her do her poem, it's REALLY funny..THAT'S her talent." CRAP. It just kind of rolled out of my mouth, I couldn't seem to control it. The maternal protection instinct just kicked in. My baby had tears rolling down her cheeks and it started a chain of motherly events.

Melissa had kind of a look of horror on her face as she looked at me and then began to "explain" why they were doing this thing. No excuse was really good enough for me. I wanted them to know I thought it sucked and they were really lucky that Averie is as good a sport as she is. I looked at Averie and knew I probably shouldn't have said anything. I haven't made so much as a peep in the weeks that this thing has gone on. I've remained quietly in the background. Silently watching. But I was overwhelmed at this point.

I didn't say anything else. Melissa said "you must be Averie's Mom, we haven't really met yet and I see you everytime." I took her offered handshake, and smiled and said, "I'm Renee, nice to meet you." And then I sat back down and remained silent. Tall Dave came in to get me and take me to my seat in the studio. I got up and went over and hugged Averie, wished her luck and told her that I love her, and I left. But all the while, I was praying with my whole heart that she would kick ass. As usual, she did. AND she made Ellen laugh again...a BIG, sincere laugh. All's well, because again, Ave is funny and she and Jeff have humor in common.

I will probably apologize to Melissa when I see her again. I figure I owe it to her for Averie's sake even though I'm not really sorry. It's the mom in me. I love my kids. Deal with it.