Health Spandex?

Ok, so the morning starts out crazily...just like always. I swear I don't know how these kids managed for 4 summers while I was working. Averie to a job interview, Caris to the doc to get a TB test read and pick up sports paperwork, drop Caris off at school for volleyball, back to Averie at the job site.

As Averie and I are going along, with her filling me in on the rest of the day's schedule and how the interview went, I notice this guy on his racing bike. He stops on a side street and takes two emply water bottles out of his little bike pack and THROWS them in an alley. WTF??? He friggin littered!

I was so flustered by it that I nearly pulled over and got out of the car to yell at him. I said to Averie.."Oh my gosh, did you see that?"

"See what?"

"That bicycle guy, he just threw a bunch of empty water bottles down the alley. Oh my god, he littered! That Mr. Bicycle Dude with his fancy bike and helmet and ...and...and...his HEALTH SPANDEX! He littered! Bastard!"

At this point, I'm so flustered by what I saw, that I'm literally sputtering.

Averie says.."HEALTH SPANDEX? Did you say HEALTH SPANDEX?" and she's laughing her ass off.

Now, I'm laughing because I realize what I said and it made no sense..but she understood me.

"Yes, dammit. Mr. Look at me in my Lance Armstrong bike Healthy Sporto Man shorts. You know what I'm saying."

Averie: (Still laughing) "Yeah Mommy, I know what you're saying, I just have never heard of it in those terms before."

Me: (laughing harder) "WELL, I'm mad.. and that was just wrong what he did."

Just goes to show you, spandex IS too tight and makes people do bad things. You heard it here.